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Giving someone love advice that's actually helpful is a lot harder than it seems. In fact, there are a few common things people in relationships do wrong when they try giving their single friends love advice. It feels weird to say that a staple human activity as timeless as dating can change, but it really can. Dating apps, the MeToo movement, the Great Recession — all changed the landscape dramatically. When you're in a relationship and you've successfully overcome challengesyou've worked through communication issues, and you've found that perfect balance between being independent and being part of a team, it's easy to think you've got the whole relationship thing down.
Kyle is the founder of Branding Beard. He writes about communication tips on Lifehack. Read full profile. Whether you just got out of a relationship or have lived the single life for a prolonged period of time, being single has its advantages and disadvantages.
And if you are like most people, it means that you will, one day, find love again. Stay single for three months. This is mostly for the newly single, but take your time.
If you just got out of a relationship, learn to enjoy life on your own. Date if you want, but do so casually. Learn what you like and dislike and give yourself a hard, firm timeline to stay single. Reconnect with your friends. Take a long weekend trip to visit your hometown, visit a new city with old friends, or hit up the beach with your best friend. Spend time doing the things you love doing with the people who know you best. Find some friends with a great relationship who are around your age and hang out with them.
See what they do well and get a view of your struggles. Be bold.
Being in a relationship can be great, but the logistics of taking a major trip can be a nightmare. Learn to say no. Take the opportunity to find someone who truly complements you, whom you have a deep connection with, and whom you find attractive. The easiest path to a happy, healthy relationship is understanding what you like and what makes you happy.
Learn what you love, discover your goals and ambitions, and write down your priorities. Make sure any relationship going forward allows you the opportunity to be yourself and reach your goals. Relationships, particularly difficult ones, can be very hard on friendships. Hit the gym and get in shape! Find unique ways to get in shape. Play tennis, golf, basketball, etc.
You may find that you meet someone who has the same interests. Meet new people every day, or at least learn more about the people you know.
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Talking to people at your office, at the store, at the gym, etc. Being single can be fun. Take it as a challenge. Learn about yourself. Take chances. Go on trips. So enjoy it. Featured photo credit: photosteve via flickr. Eugene is Lifehack's Entrepreneurship Expert.
Take your personal experience out of the conversation
He is the co-founder and creative lead of HighSpark, offering presentation training for companies. As you move towards the spotlight, your body starts to feel heavier with each step. A familiar thump echoes throughout your body — your heartbeat has gone off the charts. Sometimes, the anxiety happens long before you even stand on stage.
If your body and mind are anxious, your audience will notice. What goes on in the inside, shows on the outside. Exercising lightly before a presentation helps get your blood circulating and sends oxygen to the brain. Mental exercises, on the other hand, can help calm the mind and nerves. Here are some useful ways to calm your racing heart when you start to feel the butterflies in your stomach:. The audience will notice you are nervous.
When is it ok to become 'casually yours'?
If you observe that this is exactly what is happening to you minutes before a speech, do a couple of stretches to loosen and relax your body. Not only that, it increases muscle efficiency, improves reaction time and your movements.
Here are some exercises to loosen up your body before show time: Advertising. Ever felt parched seconds before speaking?
And then coming up on stage sounding raspy and scratchy in front of the audience? This happens because the adrenaline from stage fright causes your mouth to feel dried out.
A sip of water will do the trick. It will also amplify your anxiety which prevents you from speaking smoothly. Meditation is well-known as a powerful tool to calm the mind. Meditation is like a workout for your mind. It gives you the strength and focus to filter out the negativity and distractions with words of encouragement, confidence and strength. Mindfulness meditation, in particular, is a popular method to calm yourself before going up on the big stage.
One thing people with a fear of public speaking have in common is focusing too much on themselves and the possibility of failure. Do I look funny? Do I look stupid?
Will people listen to me? Instead of thinking this way, shift your attention to your one true purpose — contributing something of value to your audience.
Notice their movements and expressions to adapt your speech to ensure that they are having a good time to leave the room as better people. This is also key to establishing trust during your presentation as the audience can clearly see that you have their interests at heart.
There are two sides constantly battling inside of us — one is filled with strength and courage while the other is doubt and insecurities. Which one will you feed?
What if I forget what to say? All we do is bring ourselves down before we got a chance to prove ourselves. This is also known as a self-fulfilling prophecy — a belief that comes true because we are acting as if it already is.
Motivational coaches tout that positive mantras and affirmations tend to boost your confidents for the moments that matter most. Knowing your content at your fingertips helps reduce your anxiety because there is one less thing to worry about. One way to get there is to practice numerous times before your actual speech.
However, memorizing your script word-for-word is not encouraged. You can end up freezing should you forget something. It is the understanding and the application of wise thought that counts. Many people unconsciously make the mistake of reading from their slides or memorizing their script word-for-word without understanding their content — a definite way to stress themselves out.
Understanding your speech flow and content makes it easier for you to convert ideas and concepts into your own words which you can then clearly explain to others in a conversational manner. Deing your slides to include text prompts is also an easy hack to ensure you get to quickly recall your flow when your mind goes blank.
One way to understand is to memorize the over-arching concepts or ideas in your pitch. It helps you speak more naturally and let your personality shine through. Like most people, many of us are not naturally attuned to public speaking. Rarely do individuals walk up to a large audience and present flawlessly without any research and preparation.
In fact, some of the top presenters make it look easy during showtime because they have spent countless hours behind-the-scenes in deep practice. Even great speakers like the late John F. Kennedy would spend months preparing his speech beforehand. Public speaking, like any other skill, requires practice — whether it be practicing your speech countless of times in front of a mirror or making notes.
As the saying goes, practice makes perfect! Many people fear public speaking because they fear others will judge them for showing their true, vulnerable self. However, vulnerability can sometimes help you come across as more authentic and relatable as a speaker. To find out your authentic style of speaking is easy. Just pick a topic or issue you are passionate about and discuss this like you normally would with a close family or friend. It is like having a conversation with someone in a personal one-to-one setting.
A great way to do this on stage is to select a random audience member with a hopefully calming face and speak to a single person at a time during your speech. With that said, being comfortable enough to be yourself in front of others may take a little time and some experience, depending how comfortable you are with being yourself in front of others.